The giraffe had a neck as long as a pole and his legs were so long that his head almost touched the ceiling. He had a yellowy white coat with musty brown spots. He had a short body and a long tail with a tuff of hair at the end. His main was short and lead down the back of his neck to his body. He also had short ears next to these tiny horns. His eyes were big and black and he had a long nose. The giraffe walked very elegantly down the hall with his hooves making a clicking sound as they touched the ground like high heels.
Hi Ahlia, what a lovely piece of writing. I like the way you have described the giraffe and used metaphors. I think that the word elegant describes a giraffe perfectly. Keep up the great use of the Think 6 model!
ReplyDeleteKia ora Ahlia, I loved all the descriptive language you used in your writing. It was clever to compare the sound of their hooves, clicking like high heels. Well done!
ReplyDeleteHi Ahlia, I could almost draw the giraffe you wrote about using the descriptions. Your next step could be to use more similes or metaphors in your description. Can you use 'Show don't tell'? Great punctuation and some complex sentences there. Ka pai!
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